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  • Question: How do I make my girlfriend want more sex? Answer: The biggest complaint that guys in relationships have is not getting enough sex from their wife or girlfriend. In a recent AskMen.com poll 44% of men said (when asked about their overall sex life): "I wish I had sex more frequently." Guys I've talked to sometimes think that women just aren't as sexual or into sex as much as guys. My experience, however, has been to the contrary. Women are by far MORE sexual and enjoy sex much more than men do.  Their orgasms typically last longer and as a group they are much more capable of multiple orgasms than men. Yet, is very typical to hear a married guy complain that he only gets sex from his wife or girlfriend once a month. And of course it has been the subject of many a comedy on TV and in the movies. So why is it if women are more sexual than men that men are the ones who are usually complaining about not getting enough sex? The answer lies in two differences between men and women. 1) Women don't get physically turned on as easily as men. And conversely women get turned off more easily than men. So if I guy is not doing or saying the right things to his girl, she won't get turned on, and in fact might get turned off.  2) Combine that with the fact that women have one ability that men don't have and you will start to get a better understanding of the situation. Even though women are more sexual and enjoy sex more deeply than men are capable of, women are also capable of going without sex for longer periods of time. Women are not as sexually "needy" as men. Let's put it another way - Sex is first and foremost  a "quality" thing for women. Look at some of the women's complaint's in polls: 90% of women reported that they wished their partner kissed them more or with more passion. 65% of women felt their partner did not have a good kissing technique. So you see men are more into quantity and women are more into quality. But, here is what you should know, if you give a women the "quality" of sexual relations that she is desiring then she will want the quantity. And when you really turn your woman on, and she is in the quality and quantity mode, most women will have most men on the mat screaming "No Mas" in a short  period of time. So if your women is not having sex with you as frequently as you'd like, then you can safely assume that you are not doing something right in the "quality" department. You are either turning her off or not turning her on - in any case you are doing something wrong. Now, what do guys do wrong to mess up the frequency of  their sex life? Well, there are probably hundreds of answers to that one and millions of unique variations on the theme. But, here are some of the more basic and frequent mistakes that men make in their relationships with women. First let's look at what guys can do to turn women off. 1) Being a slob, smelly, or physically disgusting. I don't think I have to go into this too much, but if you want sex, you might try approaching your woman when you are fresh and clean, rather than dirty and smelly. If you like to have sex when you go to bed at night, try taking a shower first. Make sure she knows you are doing that, then get romantic. 2) Not taking care of your responsibilities as a man. Most often it is not about being dirty and smelly but about not doing your job as a man. Men are supposed to support a family. They are supposed to take care of women. Although women are liberated these days and work and earn money like men, that doesn't mean that having to work and support  a family  turns them on.  Most women are okay with contributing to the support of the family unit or boyfriend/girlfriend team, but when they start contributing more than the man and the man is plainly not doing his fair share because he is lazy or some such other trait, that's when women get a little turned off and resentful. 3) Sometimes, it is not about career and the responsibilities of manhood, but about equality of effort and fair exchange amongst group members. So when the guy and the woman both have jobs and the guy is holding his own and even making a little more than the woman, that is all good except when they both come home and she is expected to clean up the house and do his laundry while he sits around lazily and drinks beer. You see, all of the above scenarios are mood killers for women.  Even though women may tolerate some of these behaviors at first, in a long term relationship these kinds of behaviors eventually catch up with her and start killing the mood. 4) On top of that is communication. Because of the above perceived inequities women will start "bitching" at men about their career or their responsibilities or their chores at home, etc.  When men are unresponsive to communication, to discussing and handling the complaints, etc. there is only one direction for the communication to go - less sex. She is not turned on. She can't change anything about it with communication, so she just becomes not interested in sex . Some women may even consciously withhold sex on purpose to get across to you that "something is wrong" and that "we need to talk." When a guy still doesn't get what this "lack of sexual interest" is really about, the relationship becomes doomed to one of mediocrity or eventual breakup. I think the majority of "lack of sexual interest" exhibited by women are the result of the above perceived inequities - which really just turn women off sexually. Occasionally however, it is not because of the above, it is because of a failure to turn women on properly, that sexual interest is lost. Most commonly it is actually both things at once, because most men who are turning women off are simultaneously failing to turn them on. So most guys who are not getting sex often enough need to work both on turning women on as well as not turning women  off. However, occasionally there are guys who are not turning women off, they just aren't doing a very good job at turning women on. That is an easier case to handle. What mistakes do guys make in regards to turning women on? Here are the four most common mistakes that I find men making with respect to turning women on. 1) No Romance - Now I've talked about this one extensively in my other writings. So let me just put it simply here. You can't stop romancing a girl after you get her to be your girlfriend or wife. Whatever you did to get the girl, you have to keep doing it, do it more extensively, find new ways of doing it, etc. As long as you want to keep creating a relationship with this person, you have to keep creating romance with them. 2) Boring Sexual Routine - Sometimes people fall into a sexual routine that is fun a first put becomes boring when done day after day, night after night. Try some new things, vary the routine. It will help keep things fresh and interesting between the two of you. Talk about your likes and desires and new things you would like to try. Talk about your fantasies. Be willing to do things she would like to do in exchange for trying things you would like to do. If you run out of ideas, we have a free mini-course on our website, "How To Be a Great Lover" and other free materials to help you out with ideas. 3) Not understanding a woman's body - a lot of guys, especially the younger ones, don't understand a woman's body. Women need more preparatory (before actual sex) stimulation  than men. Men only have to think about it and seem to be ready to do the deed. Women need to think about it and think about it and think about it to become interested and turned on. Extensive foreplay is a necessity for women to get physically ready and mentally ready to enjoy and get into sex.  Talking, having a romantic dinner, holding hands, kissing for hours (like you did on your first dates) all prepares a woman's body for sex and turns her on. Never, never, never try to have intercourse with a woman until she is turned on. Keep kissing, keep touching, but never have intercourse until she is totally turned on. 4) Not taking a woman to multiple orgasms. Practically any woman is capable of multiple orgasms. Many think they aren't so they don't try and many aren't turned on enough or are a little turned off by their lover so that prevents them from having multiple orgasms. The reality though is practically all women can have multiple orgasms. Some need some time between orgasms, while others are little orgasmic machines that can continue having orgasm after orgasm for hours on end. The ability to orgasm and to have multiple orgasm can be developed in women who think they are incapable by a knowledgeable man. This is a subject that books are written on and if you don't know how to make a women orgasm then I suggest you get one and learn how to make a women orgasm. (See "How to Make Any Women Orgasm" on our website.)  Making a women multiple orgasm is similar. You need to learn to observe your partner's body. Learn and understand how it works. Some men are even unsure if a woman is even having an orgasm. If you are observant you will start to observe and know when she is having an orgasm. Sometimes you can feel the orgasm tighten around you as you are having sex, other times you can feel the woman's whole body tighten as she begins to orgasm, sometimes there is quiver or a vibration from her as she begins to orgasm, other times she begins to get vocal as she orgasms, or the opposite, she becomes silent as she begins to orgasm Each women is uniquely different from my experiences, but any women can be figured out if you just become observant. For some  women multiple orgasms are achieved outside of intercourse. My last girlfriend liked to have the first orgasm by finger or hand, the second by mouth, and the third and subsequent orgasms by intercourse. This may work well for a woman who becomes dry or irritated by intercourse after her first orgasm, but you can also do the reverse in that case, depending on the women -- first orgasm by intercourse then second or third orgasm by mouth or hand. For some women, orgasms are always achieved outside of intercourse. Sometimes two bodies just don't fit together the right way to naturally create an orgasm for the women. Be willing to give your partner an orgasm each time you have sex, any way you can - by finger or hand, by mouth, or by machine if you have to. Please your partner. Do whatever it takes. Always think of her and her pleasure first. As a rule I always give my partner her orgasm or orgasms first before I orgasm as it is much harder (both physically and mentally) to give your partner an orgasm when you are flaccid. If you learn to make a woman orgasm and multiple orgasm each time you have sex with her and you don't do the big mistakes to turn her off up above, I guarantee you she will give you all the sex you want. I've even had relationships in which we totally did not get along, but the sex was so good for her, that she could not break up with me, and even after we did break up, she would keep coming back for sex. In conclusion, if you learn to 1) NOT do the things that turn women off, and 2) do the things that turn women on, you will probably get more sex out of your women than you can handle. Then I will have to answer your questions when you write to me like this: "My girl and I really have fantastic sex, and I really love her, but please, she is wearing me out, I can't keep up with her demands for sex. What do I do to slow her down, without offending her?"

    Question: How do I make my girlfriend want more sex? Answer: The biggest complaint that guys in relationships have is not getting enough sex from…

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  • What have feet to do with personality theory and relationships?   Well I am sure there are people who can read every aspect of your feet. Just like palm readers do. I won't even go into whether or not those are exact sciences or even true.   I've never even really looked into it.   But when it comes to relationships, one of the biggest problems is matching people of similar or compatible personality types.   As you may know, if you have been following my writings, I am a keen observer of things. Particularly things to do with meeting women, picking up women, and relating to women.   I talk about different personality types that I named "love girls," "beautiful teases," and "gradient girls" in many of my writings. Of course those were barroom terms and observations I made 30 years ago.    These days I use more sophisticated personality observation systems. Systems that help me tremendously in my every day life dealing with family, friends, and business associates as well as my love interests and potential love interest.   But when writing for you guys there is still some value in referring to these old barroom types, because they are easily observable and most guys have bumped into them in a bar or club once or twice or more.   Most of what I observe, both then and now, has to do with motion and emotion and the actual products people produce.   Now, I'm not here to teach you about personality theory. And in fact, I won't.   As a subject it is 100 times more complex than meeting, dating and relating to women. And there are others who have already documented workable personality technologies.   But the problem with most dating gurus is related to this personality topic. There are different types of men and different types of women. Different types of people relate differently. If you want to be successful in your dating strategies it is not something you can ignore.   Most dating gurus do ignore personality types, however. They lump all men or all women into one category and talk about what women think or what men feel, when the truth is the variation between personality types is much greater than the variation between the sexes.   In simple words, the reason you don't feel like you understand women (or men if you are a woman) has more to do with not understanding different personality types than it has to do with the differences between the sexes.   When you ignore personality types, "pick up," meeting," and "relating" advice becomes a low percentage game - strategies that work only 1 out of 10 times on the general population. (Even though they might work a higher percentage of times in a specific situation where you have an accumulation of a certain personality type - like bars and clubs.)   Observational strategies that take personality type into consideration work 8 or 9 times out of ten on the general population - in every situation. Quite a difference in the success rate. When you master personality types and situational dating and relating methods you become a master of this area. When you can get 8 or 9 out of 10 women that you target, you feel good and confident about your self.   So, as I see it, the problem comes down to this. Even if you are not a master of personality types, if you had a way to meet women who were compatible with your own personality type everything would flow pretty easy. You would pretty much know what to do, know what to say, etc. It would be natural.   The problem is the majority of guys don't look at personality first, they look at bodies.   And when they do look at personality they get confused. They have no systematic way of observing, understanding and predicting human behavior. So, often it takes six months after you meet a person to get through their "façade" or "social" personality before they start showing you who they really are, and other times it is not even six months. It is a major event that occurs - moving in together, marriage, etc. - before they let down their guard and show you who they really are.   The reason I became successful picking up women in bars and clubs 30 years ago, was I was able to spot personality types from certain patterns of motion that they exhibited. From that I was able to predict their behavior and apply situational strategies that led them straight into my arms.   Now what I am really trying to do with all my writings is teach you guys how to observe these things for your self. That is what will make you a master of this area. Sometimes I can give you guys my observations which can act as short cuts to learning, and I do when I can.   So here is one of those...   This is a shortcut to personality typing and spotting that you can learn and start applying in only a few minutes from now.   It is a way you can look at a woman's body (what you do naturally) and determine a personality type in as little as a few seconds and know with a high degree of probability whether she is the right personality type for you or not.   But first a little history...   About two years ago I was visiting my chiropractor. I had an injury to one of my legs which kind of turned one of my feet outward. My natural feet angles where pretty much straight on - what I call 12 noon. If you were to look at a clock both my feet would be pointing to 12 noon on the clock dial. By definition there was no angle between my feet. They were parallel when I walked.   Because of my injury to my left leg, however, my left foot was pointing to about "6 minutes to 12 on a clock face" and my right foot was pointing at 12 noon when I walked.   I asked my chiropractor about this and I made a comment that I assumed that most people must walk with their feet pointing to 12 noon. He said that they didn't and then he said something VERY, VERY INTERESTING. He said that the angle of the feet was controlled by a muscle and organ that had something to do with the emotion of "fear."   Now, this interested me to no end, as the emotion of fear is something that I had observed and definitely played a role in personality types and typing.   I discussed it a little more with him, but in the end, I left his office with a hypothesis to test, "That the relative angle between the feet is a measure of the emotion of fear within a person."   Now, "fear" is a very important emotion when it comes to personality typing. No "fear" makes a man very brave. A little "fear" makes him conservative, a lot of "fear" makes him afraid and even more "fear" and he is terrified. If an angry man has "fear" mixed in with his anger he becomes "covert" (backstabbing - as he is afraid to attack you from the front) rather than "overt" (face-to-face) in his anger.   Interesting this thing called "fear."   For example my "love girls" of the barroom days had "no fear." In fact they were so brave they scared men.   The "beautiful teases," were very afraid, they acted brave (apparent flirt) but then ran away at the first sign of real interest.   Those "gradient girls," they just had a little fear - afraid men in bars were all just a bunch of jerks.   The strategies that I evolved to pick up these different types of women were pretty much molded to handle their different types or levels of relative "fear."   Interesting....   After my talk with the chiropractor, I went back to the clubs and looked at a few examples of these "barroom" personality types with respect to this angle between the feet.   First let me give you a few definitions in case you don't know what degrees and angles and other geometric terms are.        Let us use the face of a clock for an example. Look at the big hand and the little hand. They both start at the same point in the center of the dial, but the tips of the big hand and little hand point to different places. The two lines formed by the big hand and the little hand create an angle. The angle between them is measured geometrically in degrees.   A circle has 360 degrees. So in the clock example every minute would be a change of 6 degrees. So if we use 12 noon or 12 o'clock, the two hands are parallel and there is no angle, or 0 degrees.   When it is 12:05 on the clock, the hands create what is called a 30 degree angle. When it is 12:10  the two hands create a 60 degree angle. At 12:15 the two hands create a 90 degree angle and at 12:20 the two hands create a 120 degree angle.   Now the angles between human feet don't get much wider than that. (though I have seen a few 12:22s ) So for our purposes let's stop the geometry lesson here.   For our purposes though, I usually don't refer to the angles between the feet as 12:15 etc. as one has to turn one's head to see the angle correctly. If I am using the clock analogy, I usually refer to the feet positions as - left foot from 1 to 10 minutes before 12 noon or 12 noon if straight -- and the right foot from 1 to 10 minutes after noon or 12 noon if straight --  (i.e. left foot 5 minutes before noon, right foot five minutes after noon).   Let's continue.   Now "Love Girls" tended to have perfectly straight feet (both feet pointed at 12 noon). Gradient girls typically have an angle between the feet of about 12 to 24 degrees  - left foot (1 or 2 minutes before noon) right foot (1 or 2 minutes after noon).   The beautiful teases typically had a angle of between 72 to 120 degrees between their feet - left foot (6 -10 minutes before noon) right foot (6-10 minutes after noon.)   Now when I say usually or tended I mean about 8 or 9 times out of ten. Or a correlation of 80-90 percent with the personality type. Now for those of you who know anything about correlation that is pretty high. That means you could make predictions about personality types and be right 8 or 9 times out of ten.   Interesting...   Does that mean everyone with straight feet are "love girls"? No. It doesn't. No more than if I said college professors all tend to have a high IQ, would it mean that everyone with a high IQ was a college professor. Love Girls are just a small subset of people with straight feet.   What it means is that people with straight feet have little or no fear. Thus you will find them doing all kinds of things that exhibit little fear. They might be the kind of people that start their own business, or work on commission, or take other job or career risks that others might be to afraid to do. They might be the kind of people that will talk to anyone, share their real thoughts and opinions easily,  and say all kinds of personal things that others would be afraid to say out of embarrassment.   It could mean however, that if a girl with straight feet ever gets herself in a position where she is terribly horny, without a boyfriend, and the only thing she can think of is going to a bar with the intention of picking up some guy to get laid, well then she would most likely go about it like a "Love Girl" and NOT like a "Beautiful tease" or "Gradient Girl."   But be careful how you interpret these things or it could get you in trouble.   Remember, feet angles give you the relative amount of fear. That is all we know for sure. Everything else is a correlation.   So let's talk about fear for a second. There is situationally appropriate fear and generalized fear. Everyone - all personality types - should have situationally appropriate fear. So we all might feel some fear walking down some bad street with gangsters and hoodlums all around us late at night. We all might feel some fear trusting our life to some doctor performing an operation where only 50% of the people survive.   It is generalized fear - non situationally appropriate fear - that tells us more about personality type. Being shy and afraid to talk to women is a form of fear. Being afraid to talk to a bunch of people in front of a public speaking class is a form of fear. Being afraid to invest one's money in a business venture is a form of fear. Being afraid to leave one's nine to five job security to start your own business is a form of fear. Being afraid of the dark is a form of fear. Being afraid of the unknown is a form of fear. Being afraid of what your friends might think about something you say or do is a form of fear. Being afraid of looking ridiculous in front of your friends is a form of fear.   It is these generalized fears and non-situationally appropriate fears that determine personality type.   You see the "Love Girl" is confident and fearless. She isn't afraid of men, so when she wants to get laid she walks into a bar knowing she's sexy and knowing she can intimidate men. She just looks every man in the eye because she wants a confident fearless man - just like her.   The gradient girl is not as confident and fearless. She is afraid that most of the guys in bars are jerks. So she approaches the situation with that bias. She is not so afraid that she will run away from men who will approach her, but she will banter with them and just say, "No" when it comes to the real "pick up" moment because her fear biases her towards the viewpoint that men in this situation should be feared.   The "beautiful tease" is deathly afraid of men. She is in the bar because she is trying to overcome her fears. She is beautiful and has learned that men will respond to her, so she flirts to get attention and attraction which make her feel good. But as soon as some guy gets really interested, she runs away. She is deathly afraid and can't confront it. It takes a guy who understand this and makes her feel totally safe and in control to seduce her. Such was the technique that I worked out 30 years ago.   So how do we use this "angle of the feet" observation to help you guys with your dating and relating problems.   Well there is one giant maxim that I am going to give you in a moment, but first let me say the way you use this is to make observations for yourself. I'm  not here to give you lessons in personality theory. Just know that there are different personality types that correlate with the "angles between the feet."   Start by observing the angle of your own feet. Then observe the feet of the people that you know and observe similarities and differences in personality. Start out with major differences, Like people with straight feet versus people with very wide feet. See which angles you get along with best.   There is no right or wrong here, or good or bad. There is just compatibility.   So HERE is the GIANT MAXIM. (a truth or basic principle)   MAXIM:1 - You should not get into a relationship with anyone who is more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own "angle between the feet."  People who are more than 2-3 minutes or 12-24 degrees different from you are going to have personality types that are too different from you to achieve total compatibility with.   Remember, however, that this is only true 80-90% of the time. There will be exceptions to the rule. WHY? Because people have "façade" or "social" feet angles just like they have "façade" or "social personalities."    For example, people who are in the acting or modeling industry may be trained to walk with their feet totally straight (12 noon.) So you may have a "beautiful tease" that has straight feet because she was trained to walk that way not because she has "no fear!"  Get it.   People have accidents to their legs and feet and back etc. that can change the angle between their feet and give you a false interpretation.  Usually however it is one foot that is out, not both, but I have met people with both out as results of accidents.   MAXIM 2: - If you are in a relationship with someone who has an angle between their feet more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own "angle between the feet," and if you get along beautifully, than forget about it. You are probably in that area of the 10-20% exceptions that don't correlate. Ultimately you have to observe the person in front of you and not their feet.   However, if you are having trouble with this person in a relationship, then observe their exact angle and make a point of meeting other people with that angle and talking to them. Talk to your guy friends with a similar angle. There is a personality type here, get to know and understand it. They are different from you. They don't think like you do. So throw all your assumptions out the window and get to know the personality type in front of you.    If you can do that then you will be able to improve the understanding between each other in the relationship. The closer they are in relation to your own "angle between the feet" however, the better chance you have for long term survival of your relationship.   WHY DID I GIVE YOU THIS DATA?   This is one of those observations that took me years to observe and figure out that you can benefit from immediately.   Stick with girls (and guy friends) with similar feet angles and you will find you get along better with them.   Does this mean that we shouldn't have friends with different feet angles? NO it doesn't. It just means for those real close relationships that you can choose - girlfriend, boss, best friend, etc., you would get along better and stand a better chance of achieving a long term successful relationship with someone who is within 2-3 minutes of your own foot angle.   Remember also there are different kinds of relationships. Some buddy or girlfriend you see once a week doesn't have to be as compatible with you as someone you live with or work with every day.  Use this data to qualify those kinds of situations.   Make some observations of your own. Look at your own feet angle. Look at the people that you get along with best. What is their feet angle? Look at the people that you definitely don't like. What is their feet angle? You will discover trends. You might notice that 6 out of 10 people that you really like have feet angles within 2-3 minutes of yours and that 3 out of 10 people that you don't like at all have feet angles within 5-10 minutes from yours.   But feet angle is immediately noticeable. It gives you a quick 80-90% reliable method of sizing up people fast. It also let's you see through facades and "social" personalities as most people don't pay attention to feet and don't try to fake the angle of their feet.   Once you start making observations you can associate with the various feet angles, you will be able to predict people with relative accuracy (80-90% right).   Now as a final note I want to say, "Please don't believe me. Don't assume what I am telling you is true. Go observe for yourself."   Look at all of your friends and relatives. Correlate the angles with their personality types. Go to a busy street corner or a mall and start observing these feet angles.  A simple test or computation is the percent of perfectly straight feet (both pointing to 12 noon). Count the number of people with straight feet out of every 10 that walk by or every 100.   Do it by sexes. Do it by age groups. Do it by races. You will see some interesting things.   Here are some of my observations after 1000s of observations.   In Los Angeles/Beverly Hills where I made most of my observations, on the average:   1-2 men out of 10 have straight feet. 2-4 women out of 10 have straight feet. 8-9 out of 10 children under 8-10 have straight feet.   The above was the same for black, white and brown Americans but oddly 5 out of 10 Chinese Americans have straight feet. (didn't look at sex differences)   In Japan (Tokyo)   7- 8 out of 10 women have straight feet 1-2 out of 10 men have straight feet.   Walking or standing may be different for different people. Walking is a better determination, but how one stands can also be a clue to hidden tendencies if it is greatly different.

    What have feet to do with personality theory and relationships? Well I am sure there are people who can read every aspect of your feet.…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, what are some good general rules to follow on a blind date? Answer: Good question. Let’s talk about physical appearance. Be well groomed, take a shower before your date and smell good. (You don’t have to coat yourself with perfume, but just make sure you don’t stink. Use deodorant, etc.) Wear clean clothes. You don’t have to be a fashion model but dress in a contemporary manner. If you don’t know what that is, then look at some store mannequins, some magazines, or look at how some guys dress who go out with “hot” girls. This should give you ideas. If you can’t afford to change your wardrobe, dress as contemporaneously as possible and make sure your clothes are clean. Pay attention to your shoes. Women look at shoes. Make sure they are clean and go with your clothing. Dress to attract the kind of woman you want. Clothes make a statement. If you are a casual “fun loving” type of guy and you want to attract a similar minded woman, then don’t show up in a business suit. It may make the wrong statement. On the other hand, if you are looking for one of those high maintenance type of women that want a successful man for their mate. Then that suit, Rolex, and Cole Haan shoes may be in order. Be confident in your posture, motions, and attitude. Posture and confidence are attractive to most women on a subliminal level. If you don’t know what this is then watch some movies of classic leading men. Look at their posture, motions and how they display confidence. Start mimicking and practicing these types of motions all the time. After a while you will get comfortable with the attitude, motions and good posture. Be a gentleman. Be courteous. Open the door for her, and do all the usual gentlemanly acts. Make sure that being a gentleman is a statement of who you are, not an attempt to impress her. If you don’t know what that means, then practice being a gentleman all the time – with your mom, sisters, and women friends. If you do it all the time, it will become natural and won’t seem like you are trying to impress her. Don’t be cheap, pick up the tab. You’re a man. You are supposed to be a provider. It is part of being a gentleman. Don’t talk about sex or make blatant sexual innuendos. Be seductive and attractive by your motions not by telling her how “hot” she is or how much you want to get with her. Look her in the eyes, smile, move in close to her briefly on occasion. Touch her arm now and again lightly. These are the motions of seduction. Most of all listen. Listen to what she has to say and ask questions. Show her you really are interested in her – not just her body – and want to get to know her better. Put more attention on listening and asking questions than on bragging and telling her how great you are, and combined with all of the other factors above, you will find that most of your blind dates will want to get together with you again. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, what are some good general rules to follow on a blind date? Answer: Good question. Let’s talk about physical appearance. Be…

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  • Last week one of my friends asked a question that I thought was worth discussing. He asked me how to overcome fears that pop up sometimes when we approach women for the first time or even the hundredth time - fears we get even when things are going good. The truth is it is not an easy question to answer as it varies from person to person. There are literally entire books that have been written on that subject alone. However, one of the best techniques I have used to overcome my fears usually involves lowering the gradient. What are gradients? Gradients are like steps on a ladder. If you try to go to the top of the ladder on your first step, it will be impossible and you will fail. If you keep trying it over and over you will start building up a "complex" about failing, and soon not try anymore. If you try to jump up five or six steps on your first try, it will also be scary - not necessarily impossible but scary. Probability is that if you have no experiences jumping that high you will fail too. The right approach is to take the first step and then advance, one step at a time. It is the most comfortable way to climb a ladder. Here are some examples of how I apply that to overcome fears that pop up in approaching women for the first time or one hundredth time. As most guys do, I often go out to approach women in a social setting. This can be especially scary. So when I am approaching a beautiful woman in a social setting, rather than telling her how beautiful she is and how much I am attracted to her (which exposes my fear of being shot down in front of a lot of people and embarrassed) I lower the gradient of approach and simply say, "Hi." If a girl likes you or is interested in you she will find a way to continue the conversation. If she doesn't then I know she is not interested in me and the simple "Hi" just appears that I am friendly, not necessarily even flirting, so I don't feel shot down in front of other people. If I am starting to date a girl and I feel fearful about approaching her on taking the next step of getting intimate with her, I don't ask her, "Do you want to get intimate?" I take a lower gradient and ask her if she wants to relax, get cozy, and just watch TV at my house. If she doesn't want to get intimate she certainly won't want to be alone with me, getting cozy at my house. Or rather than trying to suddenly "kiss her", I will simply hold her hand or give her light touches every now and again to see how responsive she is to my touch. If she likes my touch she will start touching me back to give me the go ahead signal. Sometimes when I am fearful of confronting a woman about making a move, I even use “multiple choice” as a test of gradients. When planning a date and fearful to approach her directly on the subject of coming over to my house, I might say, “Do you want to (a) go to a movie? (b) go out to dinner? (c) meet up with our friends at the party? or (d) stay home and watch TV and cuddle? That way I don’t feel rejected if she doesn’t choose (d) as I didn’t directly suggest that we had to do that. But if she does select (d) I know she is ready to take it to the next level. These are some examples. When you feel uncomfortable and fearful whether approaching a women for the first time or someone you are dating, on a subject matter you are uncomfortable with, just try to think of a lower gradient that isn't as scary and allows you to make forward progress toward your goal. If you do this you will learn how to approach women and how to relate to them very quickly.

    Question: How do I approach Women? Answer:Last week one of my friends asked a question that I thought was worth discussing. He asked me how…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, I actually do alright with women in general. I have no problem approaching, talking to and securing dates with women. However, there is one exception. When a woman is really gorgeous, I fall to pieces and get real insecure and make lots of mistakes. How can I fix this? Answer: That’s a good question. One that I believe a lot of guys have in common. The problem has to do with scarcity. You probably approach and talk to a lot of women from “acceptable” looks to “pretty good looking”. You are comfortable with them and know what to do. But you just don’t meet that many absolutely gorgeous “Tens” and when you do, you want them so bad that you are afraid of messing up and blowing it so you start acting like the average guy does around any woman. When something is scarce it becomes valuable. Gold and other “precious” metals for example are relatively scarce so they become valuable. Beachfront homes, another example, are relatively scarce in any city and will usually be more valuable than a similar home in the heart of the city. It is the same with extremely beautiful women. Women with acceptable looks or a little above average are not that scarce. Pretty women, say an eight on a scale of one to ten, are rare but not that scarce. You meet them now and again. Now a woman that is a nine or ten on this scale, however, you don’t see that kind of woman every day. When I did my seven hundred dates in one year, I only met about 2 women who were a “nine” and no tens at all. So you see “tens” are scarce. (At least my “tens”. I have been accused by friends of having a “higher” rating system than most guys.) So what is the handle? The cure? Well, meeting lots of extremely beautiful women is very helpful, as after a while they won’t be that different from any other women. So, going places where extremely beautiful women hang out or working “publics” like models where “tens” may be more frequent or common than the average population will help. You already know what to do. You just have to get yourself out of your “awestruck” mindset and you will fall into what naturally works for you. Experience with extremely beautiful women will get you there. When I worked these kinds of extremely beautiful women in bars and clubs, at first I was awestruck, then after I learned to close them 100% of the time I got rather bored with them. Now, I wouldn’t even bother working these kinds of women as having had a lot of experience with them I determined that, in general, they weren’t very good lovers. (I don’t mean that all extremely beautiful women are not good lovers, just the insecure types that you find in bars and clubs.) Another tactic that will work is paying attention to personality first and looks second. Now it is okay if you qualify a woman on her looks, but after that qualification you have to immediately pay attention to personality and not her looks. When you realize that there are different personality types and that extremely beautiful women come in all of these different types of personalities, the experience factor will come in to play, as you will likely have more experience with her personality type and won’t be so awestruck by the “scarcity” of her physical beauty. If you learn how to handle the different personality types (as I teach guys to do in “Dating To Relating – From A To Z” ) then you will know how to handle her personality and be comfortable with her no matter how beautiful she is. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, I actually do alright with women in general. I have no problem approaching, talking to and securing dates with women. However,…

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  • Flirtation is an interesting subject indeed. We all do it at one time or another, in one way or another. Yet some of us do it better and more effectively than others. What would be better and more effective flirtation? Well let’s look at the definition: “Playful behavior intended to arouse sexual interest.” So any flirtation that was more effectively arousing sexual interest would be better flirtation by this definition. Now the problem with flirtation is there is no one way to flirt. As I have mentioned many, many times in my writings, different people have different personalities. What one person would consider “arousing”, another might consider crude, or stupid or childish. So are there any universal types of behavior that might be effective flirtation? Yes, communication as opposed to no communication. (Notice I said communication – not talking. Communication can be non-verbal.) In other words there has to be a communication in order to flirt. That is a universal attribute of flirtation. Successful or effective flirtation would create “attraction.” So a communication designed to create sexual attraction or interest would be effective flirtation, despite personality differences. Now remember, personalities too can vary widely on what is considered “attractive.” If you read my articles on how to meet women in bars and clubs you will remember that in order to create attraction, one type of personality required a direct confident communication said directly to them, whereas another required the opposite, an indirect communication said in their presence but aimed at another. So it can get complicated. But let’s talk about what works most of the time in normal everyday situations – not bars and clubs. 1) Smile. Definitely a flirt and usually received as such by most people. 2) Look her in the eyes, without flinching and looking away. (Followed by a “smile” is definitely a top flirt.) 3) Talk to her. Find an obvious excuse to talk to her. “Excuse me, do you know what time it is?” Or “Do you know where there is a bookstore around here?” Doesn’t matter what you say. If you do one and two above then approach and talk to her, she will know you are flirting. And it is a better flirt if you just suggest interest. Telling her how hot she is can be an effective flirt for some women, but will blow a lot of really hot women away. Keep it suggestive, you will do better in the long run. 4) Find an excuse to move in close. (Make sure you smell good when you do.) Hold it for a brief moment or two then back away again. Closeness suggests intimacy. Use it sparingly when you can. 5) Find an excuse to touch her lightly now and again. Touch her arm, her elbow, her hand. Don’t be feely, grabby – just a light touch then retreat. Again this is a form of closeness that suggests intimacy. 6) Don’t overstay your welcome. Make your flirts short and sweet. Move in, flirt. Leave and do something else. Come back and flirt again. Leave, come back. Keep this sort of cycle going. This kind of flirtation is best done with people you can see again. This won’t work on a woman walking down the street that you won’t ever see again. That would require a different type of flirt strategy and you would have to get her number or something for it to be successful. 7) Now as you get to know her in the steps above, you can extend your “drop ins” and talk a little. Be real, compliment her personality or her taste in clothes, or non-sexual parts of her body (for example, her eyes or hands). Don’t be blatantly sexual. Most of all listen to what she has to say. Play off of that. Flirtation is all about her – not about you. So don’t start bragging and talking about yourself. Now if you do these things you will create a little sexual excitement on the part of most women. I would say about sixty percent of women would respond to the above in a positive way in a normal situation. (Not a bar or club or walking down the street.) What about the other forty percent? Well that requires about fifteen other strategies. Things like “negative sex talk”, ignoring them, being close and ignoring them, paying attention to another woman, being cocky and funny, “positive sex talk”, being super romantic, talking dirty, being shy, etc. Things I talk about elsewhere….. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: How do I flirt with women? Answer: Flirtation is an interesting subject indeed. We all do it at one time or another, in one…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, I already have a casual intimate relationship with a woman, I met about two months ago. It is not serious. We get together about once a week. Problem is I am beginning to have some feelings for her and think I might really like her. Can I develop a real relationship with her? Or is it too late? How would I go about doing this? Answer: Well, this is unusual. Most of the time, guys are trying to figure out how to develop a relationship with a girl they haven’t been intimate with. Yes, it is possible but it does present some unique challenges. First of all you need to find out where this woman stands. If you guys are having a casual intimate relationship, you need to know if that is something she wants to maintain or if she, like you, is starting to feel different about things. Now if you go about this the wrong way, you can scare her off. So be careful. A lot of times people who are coming out of a divorce or a break up want an intimate relationship but they don’t want commitment or feeling like they are getting close to someone. They are trying to protect themselves from being hurt by not getting close. Of course this will heal in time, but the time factor can take one, two or even three years for some people. If you really like someone and feel they are worth the wait, you can seal the deal by not putting any pressure on them during this time, maintaining the casual relationship and just being there for them when they are ready for something else. Most of the time, these type of things don’t work out because one person is too impatient to wait and puts pressure on the other person who is not ready, so they end up in a spat and a break up. Now, from your question we know nothing about this woman. She could be a career “no commitment” type or recently divorced or one or two years down the road after a break up. So you need to ask a lot of questions in a neutral sort of way, so that you do not play your hand in case she is not ready for your feelings. The best way to maintain neutrality is to not originate questions out of the blue, but to play off of her originations. For example, if she mentions her ex and berates him, you could say, “Sounds like you guys didn’t have a very good relationship.” If she says, “Yeah,” you could come back with something like, “So does that mean you hate all men, or do you think he was just a bully?” If she says, “No, I don’t hate all men, blah, blah, blah,” then she might be more ready for a relationship then if she says “Yeah.” The conversations you will have with her will be very situational so I can’t tell you what to exactly say and ask in this short column, but perhaps you get the idea. What you don’t want to ask are questions about you and your relationship with her. That is not neutral and could get you in trouble if she is not ready for anything serious. So don’t say things like, “How do you feel about our relationship?” or “I am starting to have feelings for you,” etc. until you know if she is ready and can handle this type of topic. If she is not, you just need to keep informed of her general feelings about men and relationships until she is ready to get serious with someone again. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, I already have a casual intimate relationship with a woman, I met about two months ago. It is not serious. We…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, what does it mean when you really don’t like your girlfriend’s friends or she doesn’t like yours, but you both like each other? How do you handle it? Answer: Good question. I think it is something we have all run into at one time or another. I think it goes back to one of the basics that I teach at Dating To Relating which is personality. People come in many different personality types. Not all personality types get along with each other. On top of that, people have a social personality type – a personality that they, in a sense, “put on” because they have been educated that that is the way they should act. Then they have the real personality – the one they are despite what they have been trained to be. Most upsets I see in dating are not because men don’t understand women or women don’t understand men, they are because people don’t understand people. There are more personality differences between a happy man and an angry man, then there are between a happy man and a happy woman. We understand the opposite sex a little better than we think we do. It is people and personality differences that most of us don’t understand. Sometimes we find ourselves hanging out with relatives or people that we grew up with just because we have known them a long time, not because we like them. Or maybe it is because we work with them, or know them from school. Nonetheless, we call them friends and feel obligated to see them and hang out with them even though we don’t particularly like them. A real friend is someone who supports you in your life choices and makes you feel good about yourself in general. Anything less than that and the person is an “acquaintance” not a friend. And of course we have to look out for those few who will “help” you in a time of need, just so they can berate you and make you feel bad about yourself at other times. Who needs that kind of help? So what happens in relationships is sometimes you end up attracted to someone who hangs out with a bunch of people who are not like the person that you are attracted to. The person that you like probably has an inability to pick good friends. Or, on the other hand maybe you are the odd one. Maybe that person has good friends and you are the one that they shouldn’t be hanging with. Or maybe you are the one with a bad choice of friends or maybe you have good friends and have made a bad choice in a girlfriend. There is only one way out of these kinds of situations. You will have to communicate your feelings to your significant other and see where the chips fall. Perhaps they already suspected what you point out but never had the encouragement to disconnect from the “so-called” friends. Or, maybe their friends are much more important to them than you. Right or wrong, it is better to find out where you stand early on in the relationship, rather than waiting for a “blow-up” a few years down the road. Communication is the only way out after you are in a mess. Before that, learning to discern personality types when you meet people is the way to avoid these kind of messes in the first place. Mr. L. RxA special instantly downloadable report to get you to JUMP START your love life. Don't sit around the house wondering when you will ever date again when within hours you can get started meeting and dating 100s of women in the coming year. Mr. L. Rx has done it and still does it, and he will show you HOW! In this concise, downloadable, easy to read and easy to implement report you will learn: -- TWO separate proven TECHNIQUES for generating 100's of dates a year -- TECHNIQUES that are FAST, and SIMPLE to learn, and that you can START implementing them IN A COUPLE OF HOURS from now. That's right in just a few hours from now you can be on your way to generating 100's of dates a year. It is that POWERFUL. So powerful, that I'LL guarantee it. If you try my techniques and they don't work for you. I'll give you your money back NO QUESTIONS ASKED -- TECHNIQUES that don't require you to have any understanding of women at all. You can be shy, UGLY, and a geek and they will work. IN FACT these TECHNIQUES will not only get you 100's of dates, but the sheer experience of going out on 100s of dates will give you a better understanding of women than anything you could ever read in a book--anything that I or any other GURU could ever say to you. -- This REPORT is GUARANTEED to change your love life. That is why I wrote it. There is NO reason for you guys to wait for the release of DATING TO RELATING the book for you guys to start benefitting from my knowledge.

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, what does it mean when you really don’t like your girlfriend’s friends or she doesn’t like yours, but you both like…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, I don’t have trouble approaching women. I am forty years old and have no back off and have never had back off approaching women. However, my closing rate really sucks. On approaches, I usually get at least fifty percent of the women to give me their phone numbers, but after that I usually only get ten percent to return my call and when I go out with women I only get to second base with about one out of twenty. What am I doing wrong? Answer: Well, it doesn’t really sound like women like you very much. It sounds like you get a high percentage of phone numbers because you are probably very aggressive and women are giving you a phone number to make you go away. Guys who use our system run about eighty to ninety percent on each of the points you bring up: Getting phone numbers should be eighty percent of your approaches; eighty percent of the women you call should return your call, and when you go out you should reach second base with at least eighty percent of the women you go out with. If you are not getting these kinds of results then yes, you are definitely doing something wrong. In your case, the numbers suggest you are too aggressive. You probably need to listen more and “aggress” less. A lot of guys make the mistake of thinking that just because a woman talks to them, the woman likes them. It is especially easy to make this mistake when you are aggressive. If you are aggressive and funny, a lot of women will talk to you because you are entertaining. Doesn’t mean they are interested in you as a boyfriend prospect. Other times, women will continue talking to an aggressive guy just to be friendly or nice. I have seen a lot of aggressive guys monopolize a conversation (in other words, do all or most all of the talking) to the point that they don’t see or listen to what is going on. They take the fact that the girl is still there to be a signal that they are doing okay, when in fact the girl is just being nice or considers you entertaining and that is all. Frequently these kinds of guys get lots of phone numbers but no return calls or very few dates. These kinds of guys need to be less aggressive and learn to be a little more mellow. Just say, “Hi” to a girl and then shut up. As you converse with a girl, frequently say things then shut up. Give a girl the chance to say something to keep the conversation going or to walk away if she wants. If she stays and actually “tries” to keep the conversation going – then you know you have someone who is actually interested in you. When you just non-stop talk, entertain, or say rude things to get a reaction, women will stay and talk or listen to you, but it is not for the reasons you think it is, and it is not because they are interested in you romantically. So if you want to improve your percentages to the eighty to ninety percent range the first thing you will have to do is shut up and learn to listen and observe. If the woman is making an effort to keep the conversation going, if she stays and talks to you when you are just listening, then perhaps – just perhaps – she might be actually interested in you. Mr. L. Rx NOTE: If you would like more in depth and organized information on how to meet, attract, and have a relationship with women consider the book How I Got 700 Dates In One Year, Dating To Relating – From A To Z, or any of the other books by Mr. L. Rx.

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, I don’t have trouble approaching women. I am forty years old and have no back off and have never had back…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, a lot of dating gurus advise about using humor to attract women, however, you don’t say much about that. Why is that? Answer: Well, you are right. I do not focus much of my writing on using humor as a technique to meet women. The reason is that humor is one of those “ten percent tools” that a lot of the dating gurus recommend. By “ten percent tools”, I mean techniques that if used broadly, only work on a small percentage of women. The tools that I recommend are technologies that result in an eighty to ninety percent success rate – something that you will never achieve just by being funny. First of all humor changes with personality type. So what one person considers funny, the next person won’t. Even if you were to come up with a successful “humor” approach, to be successful eighty to ninety percent of the time you would have to change your jokes and/or delivery with the personality types you are approaching. I have done this in sales, for example. I have based a sales technique on humor and had success, but still I had to change the delivery of the humor to match the personality type I was addressing. When I was doing door-to-door sales as a kid, I found that even socio-economic types have different humor and had to base my approach on that. Having said that, humor is an obvious advantage for a guy who has the ability to be funny. Just look at some of the dating site profiles of women. Look what they put down as desired in a man. A very large percentage of women will put “funny” or a sense of humor, or some reference to humor. The problem I see for men (besides matching the right kind of humor for the right personality type) is trying to be funny all the time. Just because a woman says she likes humor or “funny.” Doesn’t mean that it should be the only thing you do — as some of the gurus would have you believe. If you had to do just one thing all the time, “listening” to a woman has humor beat hands down. But if you can spice up your listening with a few appropriate humorous comments now and again, it certainly won’t hurt and could just make you that special guy she is looking for. But the reason I don’t focus on training guys to be funny is that it is still just a “ten percent tool” and as such, not worth a lot of attention as a basic strategy. In fact “trying” to be funny all the time will backfire and wreck more approaches than it will help. When you are funny without having all the other basics in place, women will use you for entertainment and you will be relegated, more often than not, into that “friendship” role that most guys dread. And it will work on a few of a certain personality type – hence your ten percent – and that will be it. When you listen to women as your primary focus and respond appropriately in both humorous and non-humorous ways, you can break out of that “ten percent” result and achieve the kind of success ratios we strive for – eighty to ninety percent – all the time. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, a lot of dating gurus advise about using humor to attract women, however, you don’t say much about that. Why is…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, a lot of the Dating Gurus, like David DeAngelo, Mystery, Neil Strauss have techniques that make guys into “bad boys”, I think these techniques are disrespectful to women. Do these kinds of techniques work? Can’t you just be a good guy and get women? Or is it true that “good guys finish last?” Answer: Well, this is a very good question. The truth of the matter is there is no such thing as “women” in the manner that these other gurus talk about it. They talk about women as if they are all the same, when in actuality, there are many different types of women. There are many different personalities among women. The truth is these techniques do work, but they only work on a certain “personality type” of women. When you use these techniques on all women you will have success with a percentage – usually around ten percent – unless you find a way to place yourself in an environment where this “personality type” congregates. So, for example, there is a personality type that will tend to go to bars and clubs on a regular basis. So you might have a higher success rate than ten percent – maybe thirty or forty percent if you use a technique that works on these types in a club environment. Problem is when you are in the bookstore or in class at school, you may find the technique doesn’t work at all or works only one percent of the time. Or if you like a classy, intelligent type of woman, you may find that these types of techniques (which a lot of the gurus teach) don’t work at all. What works is understanding personality types and having a variety of techniques to handle the different personality types. When I worked bars and clubs years ago, I used four distinctly different strategies on the different personality types that I found there. Some of these strategies were the exact opposite of the other strategies. The point is all of these strategies worked, but they all worked on different types of women. If I just used one of these strategies, I would have been only successful on my approach one quarter of the time. But by having four different strategies, I got my success ratio up to ninety percent. The other difficulty is not only the percentage of success; it is the quality of success. For example, say you like the sweet “girl next door” type and the technique you learn only handles the hot man-eater type of girl that you often find in clubs. Then you will be successful, so to speak, but you will not get the type of girl that you want. This is a “quality” definition for failure not a “quantity” definition. Most of these gurus don’t even address quality failure in any other terms than whether she is physically “hot” or not. But the truth of the matter is guys don’t only want a “hot” girl, they want a “hot” girl that has a personality that they get along with. And that, my friends, is what we teach at Dating To Relating. We teach you techniques for different personality types and we teach you how to generate your own situational techniques. That is why we have ninety percent success in approaching women rather than ten percent success. So to answer your question, it is totally possible to get girls by being a “nice guy.” I have been a bad boy and had great success doing so, but personally I got tired of it because I didn’t like the personality type that it attracted. No one personality type has the corner on beauty or intelligence. There are plenty of “hot” girls that like nice guys. In fact, nice guy techniques are the only techniques that I personally use nowadays and I still close ninety percent of my approaches. And so can you. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, a lot of the Dating Gurus, like David DeAngelo, Mystery, Neil Strauss have techniques that make guys into “bad boys”, I…

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  • NOTE: If you would like more in depth and organized information on how to meet, attract, and have a relationship with women consider the book How I Got 700 Dates In One Year, Dating To Relating – From A To Z, or any of the other books by Mr. L. Rx.

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, I am not interested in getting married or having a girlfriend. Quite honestly I just want a sexual partner. What is…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, this girl I have been dating says she is really attracted to me physically, but she broke up with me because I don’t meet all of her needs. I don’t understand this and she won’t explain it any further. What’s going on? Answer: There are many types of attraction vectors involved in sexual relationships. Especially for women, it is not all about what you look like or sex. For example, sexual attraction can be two-way mutual sex attraction, or a one way physical attraction with another dynamic attraction factor (money, emotion, power, status, political, mental stimulation, etc.) replacing or in addition to physical attraction on the other’s part. What this girl is telling you is that physical attraction is not enough for her to get involved in a long term sexual relationship with you. I don’t know much about your situation but perhaps she is looking for an economic attraction. Some women only get involved with a boyfriend who they are attracted to and who has money enough to take care of them. Some women don’t even care if a man is physically attractive if he has money. We usually call these latter kind of women “gold diggers.” Or it could be she is looking for an emotional attraction in addition to a physical attraction. Emotional attraction can be either one-way or mutual and is usually the most compelling factor in determining relationships for both men and women. (Although men are attracted to women for other factors, usually physical, emotional factors tend to be the deal clinchers.) Emotionally, for example, we will often become attracted to a person who we know is really attracted to us because we know they will be super nice to us and treat us right. Similarly we are often attracted to people who make us feel cool, wanted, desirable, etc. Whether this feeling is generated internally (the hot girl who does absolutely nothing for you but go out and look hot in front of all your friends thereby making you look cool and desirable to others) or externally (the not so hot girl who tells you over and over again how good looking, etc. you are), we all like relating to people who make us feel good about ourselves. Other emotional attraction vectors influencing relationships involve friendship, compatibility, good communication, emotional support, and mental stimulation among others. I don’t have time to go over all of these factors here, but you should realize that it is not all about looks for women. If you want to attempt to rescue the relationship then look into some of these other areas where you may be coming up short and see if you can make any corrections. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, this girl I have been dating says she is really attracted to me physically, but she broke up with me because…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, I am a recently divorced man, 42 years old. I was married to one woman for 15 years. How do I get back in the swing of things? I haven’t dated in a very long time. Answer: Good question. There are several things you can do to get back into the swing of things. And it starts with observation. Go somewhere where men and women are dating. Watch a few couples. See how they are acting. See how the men dress. Listen to the topics that are being talked about. Listen to whether the women are responding positively or negatively to the men they are with. Observe the women. See what the women you are attracted to respond to and don’t respond to. In the end, if you are a careful observer you can learn what women you are attracted to like and don’t like in men’s behavior. Make sure you notice women’s personality. Notice what the personalities you like respond to. Most importantly go where there are lots of women and start interacting with them on any level you can. You don’t have to hit up on them to interact with them. Interact with them on a safe level. Don’t do anything that will make you get scared and want to run away. Ask them for the time. Ask them for directions. Ask them their opinions on things, but don’t ask them for a date, or to dance if that is going to make you feel rejected if they say no. Go to a night club for example and ask a few women for help. Tell them you are recently divorced and you have no clue on how to meet women and how to act and ask them for their advice. In your spare time, read advice from dating gurus such as myself, but most importantly constantly and continually interact with women. When I was recently divorced, I found that internet and personal ads were a very easy way to meet women. In fact, I went out on 700 dates in one year after I got divorced by using internet and personal ad dating sites. When you meet women in any situation – talk, talk, talk. Ask questions, ask questions, ask questions. Women will help you if you just ask. Don’t make “getting a girl friend” your immediate target. Make “learning about women so you don’t make the same mistakes” your immediate target. I spent a whole year meeting women and asking questions and learning before I settled down with one woman. It was perhaps the best single thing I have ever done. If you do the above things you will gradually not only get back into the swing of things, but after a few months you will become an “old pro.” Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, I am a recently divorced man, 42 years old. I was married to one woman for 15 years. How do I…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, my girlfriend says I am not creating our relationship. I love her and all but I have no clue what she is talking about. Can you help me understand this? Answer: When you first meet a girl and are attracted to her – you are trying to establish a relationship – whether it is just for a fling (sexual fun), ongoing friendship only (companionship and sexual fun) or something more serious – like all of the above plus living together and sharing finances and raising children together. You are hoping she will be attracted to you too, and then that will lead to friendly fun and, in most cases, what you really want and need from a woman – sexual fun. And if this happens, you’ll have a sexual relationship. Now remember, there is no static state in any relationship. Relationships either get better (you are relating more and having more fun or producing more desired products – happiness, contentment, personal goals, children, sex, etc.) or they get worse (you are relating less, seeing each other less, having less fun, having less sex, producing less products together.) So when a woman is talking about creating a relationship, she is talking about making a relationship better – more fun, more products, more togetherness, etc. And when you don’t create a relationship the opposite happens – whether you like it or not – and there will be less fun, less togetherness, less products, etc. So what is creating a relationship? Creating a relationship is doing those things which increase attraction (both physical and/or mental/spiritual), communication, understanding, mutual survival, agreements between you, and the number and or quality of the products you produce together. When you are not creating a relationship the attraction decreases (physical and/or mental/spiritual), the communication worsens, the understanding and mutual survival lessens, the agreements between you lessen and/or are broken, and the number and quality of products you produce together go down. So, let’s translate this into actions you can do. Well, you probably already know how to create a relationship. Most guys do it when they are romancing the girl to get her. They bring her flowers, open the door for her, assure her she looks nice (when she is worried about it), listen to her gossip even though it bores them out of their mind. They go to the mall with her when they really hate shopping. They go to chick movies with her now and again. Get it guys? You know what I am talking about, creating is all those things you do to get the girl! Now the problem is most guys do all kinds of things they don’t like just to get the girl. So, after they get her and feel comfortable with their position, they stop doing all those things that they don’t like. Problem is guys, that is the death toll for the relationship. Whatever you did to get the girl you have to do more of it, more frequently, and in new and better ways to create the relationship and keep her. And if your girl is complaining that you are not creating the relationship any more, I will bet you anything you are not doing the things you did to get her anymore. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, my girlfriend says I am not creating our relationship. I love her and all but I have no clue what she…

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  • Question: Mr. L. Rx, you talk about your advice being a technology rather than a strategy. What is the difference and why is it important at all? Answer: A strategy is detailed instructions on how to do something or how to approach something that if you employ (even without fully understanding it) will work a certain percentage of times. A technology is a full understanding on all the principles of an area so that one can master the area. A technology will generate dozens of strategies each of which works under certain circumstances. Why does anyone need a technology instead of a strategy and who would be the kind of person that would want a technology rather than a strategy? Well, there are several reasons why a person might prefer a technology to a strategy. 1) If you are just the kind of person who wants to master an area, you would prefer a technology to a strategy. 2) If you are tired of the low yield that dating strategies produce and would prefer to close 80-90% of any of the women you meet in any situation rather than 10% of the women that you meet in general circumstances you would prefer a technology to a strategy. (Actually, some strategies – some that I give you in my writings – can yield as much as 80-100% results – if you apply them under certain specific conditions and with certain specific personality types. The problem is these same strategies will not work at all – 0% results – under other conditions and with other personality types- and this is not what most gurus will tell you about their own strategies.) 3) If the strategies that you have been exposed to require you to do and say things that just don’t feet right, that just aren’t you, then you would prefer a technology to a strategy. A technology will allow you to generate your own strategy that works for you that you are completely comfortable with doing. After observing the “Dating Guru” scene for many years and buying many of these products myself to sharpen my own game, I realized that none of these guys had any technology, only strategy. Moreover, when I looked at there results, there statistics were worse than mine. I learned a lot from these typical “dating gurus.” After all, anything anyone has to say on the subject is applicable to certain situations and I find that valuable. I certainly have not done everything and there are certainly many clever guys other than me who have come up with clever strategies for meeting and dating women. So, all of these guys are good guys in my opinion. They are ALL trying to help their fellow man. But there is a problem out there. There are not TECHNOLOGIES only strategies, and that is why I write. Gurus can come up with a strategy that works from trial and error, word of mouth, watching other guys, etc. But a technology of dating and relating is a way to develop many strategies from theory and observation that are applicable across a wide variety of situations and personality types – any situation, any personality type, that you choose. It is a way to adjust and correct with changing times, situations, needs, etc. Most importantly, a technology is a way to get what you want. A strategy sometimes will leave you high and dry in that department. I hope that clarifies it for you. Mr. L. Rx

    Question: Mr. L. Rx, you talk about your advice being a technology rather than a strategy. What is the difference and why is it important…

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